Tuesday, October 26, 2010

La Ronde

In Part 3 of Patti Abbott's, LaRonde series, "Provocateur" by KA Laity, http://katewombat.blogspot.com/2010/10/le-ronde-part-three-provocateur.html we were left with a man making love to a purple bra. It also left me wondering where do we go from here?

ENTER THE FAT LADY
by Sandra Seamans

Jeanette sat on the edge of her rumpled bed clicking through the photos of James Preston that she'd capture in her cell phone. She could hear muffled moans coming from the connecting room and wondered if James was crying about getting caught in a compromising situation or jerking himself off with that tacky purple bra. Jeanette shivered. She had actually believed that he still wanted her, loved her. It was pretty depressing to realize that he'd been lusting after her underwear for the past two years and not her. Well, she'd find a way to make him pay.

The photos gave her a number of options. The first would be to sell them to the scandal sheets for a nice little nest egg, but then she'd be out of a job and no one would ever hire a PA who splattered her boss' secret life all over the front page. The truth was, she rather enjoyed the perks that came with being Preston's personal assistant. Which reminded her, she had the UNM party to attend and important people to schmooze. She might even find a chance to console that poor poet with a peek at her pictures. Grady Disch was an attractive man and just maybe...she let the thought trail off as she changed into her sexiest party dress.

Walking off the elevator into the hotel lobby Jeanette found herself facing the paparazzo's darling, India Hamilton. The fact that the woman was James' wife would forever leave a bitter taste in Jeanette's mouth. Barely a month ago India had financed her way onto the set of Tarantino's new movie and slept her way into James' life. After a staggering total of three dates with her uber-thin, yoga-flexible body, India managed to talk James down the aisle of a Vegas wedding chapel. She was rich, useless, and the world's poster girl for accessorized malnutrition. Everything Jeanette yearned to be.

"Fashionably late as usual, I see," whispered Jeanette as she leaned in for India's standard double kissy-cheek greeting for the paparazzi.

"I may be late, but people are still thrilled to see me, which is more than I can say for a fat bitch like you. I can't fathom why James keeps you around, you're not that talented. I'd have fired your ass ages ago."

Jeanette smirked as she pulled away from the imitation greeting. "After what I saw tonight, I doubt if he'll ever fire me."

"I wouldn't count on that, if I want you gone, you'll be gone."

Jeanette took her phone out of the evening bag she was carrying and flashed India a look at her husband in all his purple lace glory. "Now, that's what I call job security. I guess you're stuck with the fat bitch forever, you anorexic whore."

The surprised look on India's face as she flounced onto the elevator was just the beginning of a fairytale evening for Jeanette. She managed to convince Rav Noonan that James would be perfect in the supporting role of her next project and an audition was scheduled for tomorrow afternoon that would cinch the deal. Jeanette also discovered that Disch was not only attractive, but a most appreciative and experienced lover. Life was beautiful she thought as the cab pulled up in front of her hotel.

She was so wrapped up in the bliss of her evening that she barely noticed the police cars blocking the street, their lights strobbing a caution warning to passersby. Getting caught in a barrage of paparazzi camera flashes as she exited the taxi brought her thumping back to reality. Whatever happened inside must be big to bring out the trash collectors and the police.

As Jeanette pushed through the lobby doors, the crushing sound of voices went quiet and faces turned to stare at her. Was it James? Had something happened to him? Why was everyone so quiet?

"That's her! Jeanette Campbell. She murdered my husband."

Before the word murder could infiltrate Jeanette's brain, India launched her emaciated body in a poor imitation of a bottle rocket, bouncing off Jeanette's solid body and falling to the floor in a heap of tears. The sound of cameras clicking and whirring filled the air.

Police officers pushed Jeanette to the floor beside India, pulling her arms behind her back and cuffing her. As one of them read to her from a printed Miranda card, India inched closer.

"James was strangled tonight with a lovely purple silk bra," whispered India. "I'm willing to bet that the pretty pink box it came in will be found in your room."

"But I didn't kill him."

"Too bad the evidence says otherwise," said India.

As the cops pulled Jeanette to her feet, India stood, Jeanette's purse clutched firmly in her hands. She leaned in for a final whisper, "Funny, it sounds like the anorexic whore is singing the fat bitch right off the stage."

14 comments:

pattinase (abbott) said...

Brilliant from beginning to end. And a perfect last line.

Anonymous said...

Sandra - This is fantastic! What a wonderful ending line, and I love the way you've tied in other characters, too, from the other "chapters" in this La Ronde. I enjoyed every bit of this :-)

Evan Lewis said...

Diabolically cool. And aside from Patti's Charles Prescott, you have the whole cast involved. This thing is turning into a novel.

Charles Gramlich said...

Yes, very enjoyable, and that last line is killer.

pattinase (abbott) said...

Wait till you see what Rob does with it next week. I am amazed how such great writers signed on for this.

K. A. Laity said...

What fun! That was a hoot! Ha ha ha, but ah, poor James! He wasn't so bad... well, maybe he was. I can't help hoping something terrible happens to India Hamilton, though. Hee hee -- what fun.

sandra seamans said...

Thanks so much, everyone! I was drawing a blank until I started wondering what she would do with the pictures and who she might be jealous of, then everything just fell into place. And yes, it's a great lot of fun and I can't wait to see what Rob has done with it.

Chris Rhatigan said...

Ah, what nice folk!

Dark, funny and slimy, Sandra. These lines are genius: "She was rich, useless, and the world's poster girl for accessorized malnutrition. Everything Jeanette yearned to be."

Richard R. said...

Excellent. I was starting to like Jeanette so I hope she can squeeze out of the crime and come back in some way, after all lots of people saw her at the party and the poet can give her an alibi, and the TOD will be revealing. Meanwhile the Thin Mint will undoubtedly get hers... What fun this all is.

nigel p bird said...

the bar started high and it's still right up there. great series so far. looking forward to the next one.
i've just gone from 1 to 4. it's impressive the way the characters are consistent from one to the next.

P.M. said...

My enthusiasm for this story grows with each new entry. Great work by all involved so far.

sandra seamans said...

Thanks everyone! You certainly know a project is working when the readers start to care about the characters and what's going to happen next. And this one seems to be rolling along nicely, Patti!

Al Tucher said...

Good, nasty fun!

sandra seamans said...

Thanks, Al!